Thursday, April 30, 2009

And along came Yoga

Most of you know I love yoga. I am the strange person who likes to work out, who actually loves to work out. Our honeymoon being no exception. We were at the gym almost every day - critical to sanity. Now, once we got to Phuket however, they had classes. All kinds including Yoga and Yogalates. So clearly, I had to take them.

Day 1: Yogalates. We arrive. Meekly walk in, reminiscent of our dance class days. Wander up to the counter. The man asks, "can I help you". Jeremy turns away, as though the man would throw a dagger at him for entering the gym. I looked at him and said, "uh, sir, we're here for yogalates, I think". "Ahh, ahh, yes, towel, water...go sit, wait". Okey. Done. We are soon guided out to the hotel common area where we walk through winding tree lined paths to what we learned was called the 'Wellness Sala'. In otherwords, small, poorly air conditioned shack. However, it was quite beautiful with trees all around and nothing but glass to see out.

We walk in, quizically look around and take a seat on our mats. The man tells us to lie flat on our mats, face down. He then says something, which I swear was in Thai, and sounded something like, "Nah strach za eech acing ahhhh". In Minnesota, when we start yoga in such a position there are typically some calming words spoken, motivating phrases, things like that. I assumed that this was just such a phrase, just one I didn't understand. However, a few momements later I hear rustling and notice that everyone is standing with their backs arched and I am laying down face flat on the ground. And my new husband stares at me on the brink of laughter. "I CAN'T UNDERSTAND HIM", I state, in a not so quiet tone.

Yoga teacher then states, "beeth wi ya yip gay". I brushed this off thinking that it was part of the 98% of of supposed English that I did not understand. However, a few moments later, he repeats, "beeth wi ya yip gay" - in a seriously animated tone. This goes on, for several minutes, repeating the same phrase until I fall, perilously, onto my mat in a heap of histaric laughter. The class, staring at me, while I am laughing at whatever, "beeth wi ya yip gay" is. Jeremy turns to me - stares me in the eye, as I am inconsolably laughing and says, "Kara, breathe with your rib cage". He was trying to tell me to breathe with my rib cage. Oh yea, like that was super clear!

Day #2. Because Yogalates was just so much fun we decide to go to Power Yoga. Power Yoga is what I do at home, so I thought, this will be great! Not so. Again, we encounter the all too familiar language barrier. This is coming from the girl, who will sit for hours and listen to people speaking languages other than English, which I do not understand, but try to piece together with their managerism. However, in Yoga, this is not as possible. I must listen, and I must respond with action to the instructor's words.

This next instructor's words were more discernable, but nonethe less hilarious. This gentleman proceeds to shout what sounds to me like, "DUCK PO-SIT-SHON". For the rest of us that is Dog Position, which is then translated to Downward facing dog. Thankfully, I was able to make the connections to figure this one out, but nonetheless, still fell on the ground in histaric duck-position laughter about 6 times.

In general Phuket news, we are happy that we are now here as the rioting in Bangkok has gotten quite bad. We have had good timing, and are hoping things will calm down before we go back. Our families are starting to get pretty nervous....For now, we'll just be happy we are far away from Bangkok.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Pause from the trip updates

To tell you about the panic within our home...

Swine Flu. We are all concerned about this. The term pandemic in itself sounds like the title of a movie. Well, within the Frank family household - it is also a pandemic. Panic is the disease which has broken out. Jeremy is slightly paranoid, and Kara is easily panicked by others - particularly in regards to diseases - which has therefore caused pandimonium.

A few nights ago we spent the evening driving from store to store trying to find masks. Jeremy's logic, should said pandemic break out, it will be $20 well spent so we have masks. If not, we are the looneys with $20 masks. So, we drove to Walgreen's...

All out of Masks

We then drove to Snyder's...nobody shops at Snyders...

And above rests the empty shelf where masks once stood.

Finally, we tried CVS

Where this sad consumer also found that masks were not to be had.

We went home, defeated. But Jeremy is smart, and works in retail. He went straight to the source. - that's right - we ordered protective masks straight from the source. You may call us paranoid, we call ourselves prepared. Pig Flu prepared. Now lets hope it doesn't get that far. There's a reason why Jews don't eat pig. I'm just sayin'....dirty pigs and their flu.

More Thailand tomorrow...if you care

Thursday, April 23, 2009

And pirates are attacking Bangkok too...

Or at least that's how Jeremy puts it. We are leaving Bangkok today headed for Phuket, Thailand. We are feeling very fortunate about our timing for two reasons. First, tomorrow begins the Thai New Year. As I mentioned previously, this involves driving trucks around the city with monks in the back who squirt or throw water at you. Strange, but oddly fun. Second, there is a bit of political unrest in Bangkok. As with many situations, from what we have seen, this conflict has been exaggerated by the media. Make no mistake, there are riots, though we have not yet encountered them, but we still feel quite safe - and have been traveling all around Bangkok and have not seen a single protester. We are fine, happy, but looking forward to getting out of the city should the violence escalate (and the beach is sounding nice about now).

Phuket is an island in southern Thailand and is a popular vacation spot for Europeans, Russians, Israelis - but it doesn't seem to be popular with the Americans. Perhaps the 21 hours of flight time has something to do with that. Those people just have not yet discovered Ambien.

We took Thai Airways to Phuket. This was quite exciting to Jeremy as it is consistently ranked as "the second best airline in the world". Keep in mind, while at the airport, he made the same claim about approximately 5 other airlines. However, it was quite lovely. These people know how to clean a plane. The arriving plane landed, Thai Airways staff was waiting with an arsenal of 19 cleaning people to clean an A300 plane. That's a lot of people. They file in there like ants, clean like crazy, and 10 minutes later - we are boarding the plane. We are seated in the last row of the plane, the only two seats next to each other. We are certain that our Thai concierge who came with us to the airport and checked us in, in Thai thought this would be romantic. Romantic until I vomit due to the bumpiness. Romantic.

However, we walk to the back of the plane and pinned to my seat is an orchid corsage. Northwest, you could learn a thing or two from the 2nd, or 3rd, or 4th best airline - whatever they are today. The flight was fine (albeit there was a minor freak out from Jeremy who thought that the flaps were not down for takeoff...causing him to scream in fear thinking we would not take off from the ground. Turns out we were in a plane without flaps on that part of the plane). Otherwise - non-eventful.

In Phuket we are picked up by our private Mercedes transfer, we ride in style, and then driven to the JW Marriott. Now here is what I find to be the single best part about Thailand. We are greeted by a hotel employee, "Hello Mr. and Mrs. Frank, let me take you to your room". No waiting in line, no checking in, no deciding which credit card to use, and fussing about the right room etc....Ideal for families with children. They just take you up there, get settled, and they do the rest while relaxing in your air conditioned room. Amazing. Reason enough to visit Thailand. These people know customer service!!! And from a girl who hates nothing more than waiting in line - I know good customer service - its the little things!

More to come....

Monday, April 20, 2009

The floating market etc…

The Floating Market:

Day 3

On Friday we visited Thailand’s famous floating market. The market had been known for its vastness and as a place where people would do their daily shopping. Today, it is a place where Thai people hawk their goods, wears and foods to tourists. Make no mistake, it is quite amazing. Tens of Thai merchants, rowing their boats, selling goods to eagar tourists in long narrow boats. Here too, Thailands traffic is a problem. Floating market consumers colliding their boats with merchant boats. Peaceful but hectic - everywhere there are people pushing Thai silk, mango sticky rice, soup, meatballs and sausage. It is a sight to see.

Speaking of meatballs and sausage. (Now that’s a way to start out a paragraph!) Thai’s love their meatballs and sausage. I say this partially because I have no idea what the majority of the street food was, but I do know the format. Meatballs or sausages. Shrimp, chicken, pork, insects - all either ground up, made round in a ball and skewered on a stick; or ground up and stuffed into a casing to make a sausage form. On the street, I really could not tell, nor was I brave enough to try the items to figure it out - but at our hotel breakfast, there were signs telling us what everything was. “Fish Balls” “BBQ Chicken (sausage)” “stewed pork (sausage)” “vegetable balls”. Breakfast, lunch and dinner, either in the form of a sausage or a meatball.

On our way back from the floating market tour we stopped at a wood carving workshop. It was a roadside attraction created for tourists, but it was truly amazing. Thai men and women sat hunched over blocks of wood carving the most amazing things. There was a giant dining room table with the entire top carved as elephants on top of each other - 3 Dimensional with glass over top. I really wanted it. Jeremy reminded me that it was $20,000 and wouldn’t quite work in our condo at the Groveland. Alas, I admired and walked on. When we were done looking we sat and waited for the other couple that was on our tour. As with the previous stops on this tour ‘Mr. and Mrs. Tour guest strangers’ took quite a while. Jeremy and I found some giant wood carved patio furniture (that I also felt would be nice at the Groveland) and we waited. We waited and waited. After quite a while Jeremy turns to me and asks, “What do you think your dad would do if we called him and told him, ‘Jay - uh, we are lost, stuck in a wood carving workshop somewhere in Thailand. We don’t know where we are, but we know there is a lot of carved wood and we need to get out.’?” I laughed, thinking of Jay Weinblatt on the other end. He would first try to call the police: “Police, my daughter and her husband are stuck in a Thai wood carving factory and they need help” The police would likely hang up. He would then try the state department, who would ask for details and he would say, “a wood carving factory, with a large elephant table, that’s all I know”. We laughed. Looked at each other, got a bit nervous and went to find our guide!

Thankfully, we were not lost at a woodcarving workshop. Thankfully Jay Weinblatt did not need to send out the FBI. And thankfully, I know if we were, he would come a lookin’.

The lady we bought mango sticky rice from:

Friday, April 17, 2009

We're back - safe and sound - and sunburned.

Jeremy before our first Thai massage:

I'm sorry I was not able to post more on the trip - our access to internet was limited, and well, once we got to Phuket - I was too dang sunburned to type on a computer. Have I mentioned yet that Thailand is the worlds hottest place? However, I am a loyal blogger (ACHEM DEBRA FITERMAN WHO IS NOT!) and I wrote blog posts on our little computer in Thailand so I will now post them day by day - enjoy! Or ignore if you find it mind bogglingly boring. However, here's hoping that's not the case.

Day 2

In an effort to save you from a play by play of each day, I will simply outline a few ‘significant’ events of our trip to Thailand.

Let me preface this with some background information. A few weeks ago we went to see a movie, Taken. Let me preface that with the knowledge that I hate scary movies. When I was young, my cousin Jen used to make me watch America’s Most Wanted and I hated it. I had nightmares about it. Still do. Nothing has changed. I still hate scary movies, and I cannot stop thinking about them for months if not years. Taken is the story of a girl who visits Europe with a friend and is kidnapped and sold into the sex and drug industry. There is one scene where the girl is fully doped up and abused, chained to a bed inside a room with purple curtains as walls with gold tassels adorning the walls. There are girls upon girls in these little rooms separated by curtains, all of whom are passed out waiting for their next client. Nightmares.

Relevance: Today we visited a spa again. Now, I should use the term spa lightly. Jeremy decided that since the place we visited the day prior was a bit rough on his back, that we should try a new place. So we did. He found this place, and we entered the storefront, well I should say - we stood at the door and I made Jeremy walk in first. He meekly entered as I followed behind, hiding behind him. We followed the signs stating, “Foot reflexology and massage” up three stories of steps. We walk to a glass door, a Thai woman spots us and comes running - hands in the air. Clearly, we are the first clients she has seen in quite some time. We walk in. We choose the hour long foot massage for $150 Baht (about $4.00). We meander back to the rooms and are greeted by two Thai women who quite literally push us into bark-a-loungers. Surrounding these bark loungers are purple curtains serving as walls. On each wall hangs a gold tassel. In each room sit’s a little Thai woman, waiting to rub our feet. Understand the previous reference now? I have a flashback and get quite nervous. Taken.

We sit and proceed to have our feet assaulted for the next 60 minutes. They call it foot reflexology, I call it foot assault. The foot massage concludes with the little Thai women telling us to sit on the floor. They then crack our backs and flip us over before we stand up and bleary eyed stumble out of the ‘spa’. Foot assault. But really, it was pretty darn amazing. The US needs to get on this $4 hour long foot massage train - we would be a much happier people.

River Taxi from our hotel:

Wat Po which we saw on our first day:

Saturday, April 11, 2009


We are currently sitting in a very smart invention, maybe it is everywhere but I just have not seen it - internet cafe in the airport. We are on our way to Phuket the beach town. After 4 days in Bankok - we are ready for some beach. Bangkok is amazing, but it is a sea of humanity. And really - how many massages can 2 people have? I may have broken in half from so many Thai women running up and down my back. We are safe and happy, though if you ask Jeremy, maybe not so safe. He is not such a fan of the cabs here. To his credit, this is the most rediculous driving city I have ever seen. It is traffic that would put NYC to shame. 11:00 am - bumper to bumper traffic. Midnight - bumper to bumper traffic

When I was younger my cat died and I was at summer camp, and my mom thought it best not to tell me until I got home, a month later. Needless to say I had a nightmare and freaked out that something happened to Punky and made Jeremy call petsmart last night at midnight. She's okay - not to worry. I was. Its a problem, I can't help it. I had a traumatic childhood of secrets. (:-) ) RIP Marshmellow the cat

Apparently the Thai new year begins this weekend in Thailand. And how do they celebrate you may ask? Well, monks ride around in the back of pickup trucks and throw water and people. Needless to say, I have had water thrown at me a number of times by passing monks. That is truly an experience I will likely never have again. Though I have to say - it is so flipping hot here - all I want to say to the monks is - THANK YOU! Will someone please google and tell me why they do this?

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


Before we left for this Honeymoon adventure, Debra informed us of a phrase she likes to use when visiting Africa. TIA (This is Africa). This references things that just would not happen in the US, and you simply have to shrug it off and say, TIA, and that's how it is.

Well, we've had many, many TIA (this is Asia) experiences thus far, but none on the negative end, rather quite positive, TIA - this would never happen in America.

---TIA - our 2nd flight was quite delayed and our driver simply stood there and waited for us for several hours. When we arrived she simply said, 'you must be so tired'. TIA.

--- As we walked into the Hotel in Bangkok I was greeted at the door with a bouquet of roses, and the friendliest man you could ever hope to meet at 2:30am greeting me with, 'Congratulations, Mrs. Frank'. "Did you arrange for this?" I questioned Jeremy. "HAH - NO!" He responded. TIA. (we proceed to go up to our room with 4 'helpers' to find the room with vases of roses EVERYWHERE - thanks to the Royal Orchid Sheraton)

--- This morning we visited Wat Po. Now I would like to recount some amazing story of what Wat Po is, but the natives English is meager at best, and what they do say is close to incomprehensible - so this is what I know after visiting. Wat Po is an amazing garden with one GIANT leaning gold Buddha, and several smaller sitting Buddhas, each in separate buildings. At the end of Wat Po is a massage building, where, for $6.00 US you can get a 45 minute reflexology foot massage. 2 PLEASE! And they were amazing. TIA

--- We then visited the single most amazing mall ever. Now you may think I say this due to the shops or the size. No, I say this because of the food court. The shops, yes, they were unreal (Gucci, Prada, Tiffany, Kate Spade, ridiculous....), but the food court - now that was out of this world. I have never in my life seen anything like it. There were about 50 different booths with various Thai food options, buns, curry's, rice and noodle dishes, soups etc... Then, we soon realized that the Thai's value dessert. Mom - you would love it here. About 65% of this food court was consumed with bakeries, ice cream shops, fro yo shops, gelato, cookies, bulk candy - like NOTHING I have ever seen before. part - free samples of everything! We literally could not make it through the entire place. My favorite shop - they had an entire booth with various kinds of buttered bread. Yes, buttered bread. (plain butter, almond butter, sage butter, sweet butter, peanut butter) We might bring this concept to the US. Think about the overhead - $0. TIA.

--- Next we visited a custom tailor shop (well actually many tailor shops until we found the one we were looking for). Tailor shops are on every corner, more realistically - 5 per corner, seriously, everywhere you look - THAI MASSAGE / TAILOR SHOP. It is Jeremy's dream. He ordered 2 custom suits, 5 custom shirts, and 2 silk ties for $420 US. And that was the most upgraded fabric choice. Has anyone ever seen that Seinfeld where Jerry goes to George's tailor for the first time and he touches him inappropriately? Starts measuring in places that are not quite necessary? Well that is slightly reminiscent of this place. I didn't know there were that many measurements that could possibly be taken. This could be a problem...we already brought 4 suitcases on the way here! TIA

--- Now we were tired so we felt like we deserved massage #2 of the day. This time, true Thai massage. This involved us both disrobing and putting on silk pajamas. We then lay and wait for these small Thai women to enter our booth. We look up - there they are, and the proceed to climb upon us. Walk on us. Yank us. I swear, they pulled my thigh up to my ear. I heard things crack I didn't even know I had. I had a little Thai woman climb on me for 60 minutes. For $9 each! TIA

--- And on our way back from the city we waited for the water taxi to board. Yes, that is how we travel in Bangkok. Via water taxi. The taxi picks us up at our hotel and takes us where we need to go, or to the place where we need to transfer to a different form of transportation. Well this sounds fun and neat until a person has had 3 bottles of water before they board the single most rocky form of personal transportation known to man. This was the final thought to go through my mind as our taxi pulled up to our hotel, "Its okay, you can go now, you don't know anyone here, you can just tell them, 'I swear its sweat'". TIA (it is flipping hot here)

For now we have Internet in our hotel - I hope to write again tomorrow. Much love to everyone - we are having a blast - you all need to come here stat! And if you're wondering how I did on the flight, clearly I was tired - I slept 17 of the 21 hours of the flight!!!!

Sunday, April 5, 2009

We got hitched

So we had this little shindig this past weekend, okay, so a big shindig - the wedding! I will not bother to recount every detail of the day, though if you want me to, that would make me quite happy! However, as you must realize by now I like lists. Below are a few from the wedding day to tell you a bit about April 4, 2009:

Top 10 funniest moments:
1. Jeremy saying that he blessed the rings instead of blessing Israel in the ceremony.
Jeremy: And g-d bless these rings
Rabbi: Israel, Jeremy. G-d bless Israel, not rings.
Rings are lovely, but we don't need to bless them. They are sparkly all on their own, no blessing necessary.

2. For those of you who were not at the rehearsal dinner, you may not know that Jeremy was the youngest winner of the WCCO Good Neighbor award for his 'work at Meadowbrook elementary school'. Yes, he hung out with the ladies in the office and helped them sort papers. Art found the tape and replayed his award winning announcement.

3. Apparently it is not easy to bustle a dress. I found myself in the middle of the cocktail hour in the bathroom with Debra trying to fix my dress. She couldn't get it so my accountant's wife (who also happens to be one of Jer's high school teachers) and her mom had to climb UNDER my dress to bustle it. Hot.

4. Jer jumped the gun a bit and proclaimed: I DO ....and all the rabbi had said was, "Do you take..." In his defense it was a bit of a pregnant pause, but regardless!

5. Dave Weil - announced he had changed his ways and would not be the drunkest at the reception. 4 hours later, you could find Dave Weil in the bathroom, face down.

6. SeXXXy limo lived up to expectations - it had neon lights coming out of the bottom!

7. Our photographer decided to take us to, "a nearby location with great architecture". Turns out it was Welsh Companies - my former employer. Oh yea, took pics at good ol Welsh.

8. We did not face plant during our dance. That may not seem funny, but really - it was a small miracle and must be mentioned - The dancing gods were looking down on us.

9. Apparently my father is going out to New York to visit Jeremy's college friends. Or so they told me. Wonder how my mom's going to feel about that one.... :-)

10. And the single funniest moment of the day was when Jeremy realized in rehearsal that he was not tall enough to get my veil over my head in the ceremony. He couldn't reach. No worries, my mom was tall enough to reach. She lifted it off.

The #1 most common comment of the night: You look beautiful, I LOVE your blog!
This comment came from people ranging in age from 15-86. That makes me so happy!!! I am so thrilled people are reading it! It you continue reading, I will continue writing. I even have a name for my new blog ....
Kara was

Like it??? I'm sure I'll find nonsense to write about it my audience remains. Sally Shiff says she's going to work on a business plan for a book deal...publish the blog?! I'm not entirely sure who would want to read my craziness, but maybe, heck, you all read it, and I like you guys. Well most of you. KIDDING. All of you. usually.

On a final note: We leave for Thailand tomorrow morning. I will try my best to blog from Thailand. I am feeling like quite the ignorant traveler at this moment. I am fairly decent at languages, but Thai, I just can't get. I have however learned 2 critical phrases.
#1. Help, I have diarrhea.
#2. These drugs aren’t mine. (This one I know because it was on the Thai app for my iphone - why, I have no clue)

Keep watching the blog, hopefully I can update. I love you all. More wedding details will be shared after we get back. For now, thank you all - you really don't know how much it means to me that you read this. May seem silly, but I really do love to hear that.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Twas the night before the wedding...

and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, except for my mouse. BECAUSE I AM BLOGGING! This is dedication loyal fans. If for all this time you have been passively reading and not commenting, let this be the day you announce to the world that you do in fact have a guilty pleasure, and is my blog!

Most importantly, the moment you have all been waiting for.

Imagine where most people likely start their first class. The box step, maybe a turn, maybe a walk, yep, that's where we ended. We arrive, after much duress, and realize we have forgotten the ipod with the music. Oh darn, we will have to go back home, which will certainly kill an additional 15 minutes round trip, and alas, we have to leave exactly at 4:00pm so we cannot go over time. Darn, we will be late. And we are. And the teacher, who likely has not showered since 2002 doesn't seem to notice we are late.

We begin class, this time, remembering about 42% of what we have learned in our 3 previous sessions. We practice about 14 times - the teacher stops us for a heart to heart.
"Have you two known each other since you were children?" he asks
"Why no, we have known each other for about 3 1/2 years."
"I think you knew each other in a previous life" he responds
Note: this is too weird, there is no possible way I could make this up

"Really?" Jeremy responds. (and if you know Jeremy you know this was not said with much compassion.

And at this point, a very interesting thing happens, Jeremy looks at the clock, for the 44th time in 41 minutes and actually has a look on his face that says
"I would rather dance than listen to greasy man talk about what I did in a previous life"

Yes, I believe in fact, he would have rather danced.

Class proceeds. We practice the dance many more times. We learn the secret is that Jeremy needs to talk me through the entire thing, so it goes something like this: we're going back now, left to right, promenade, promenade, slow turn, slow turn, back, back, promenade. And again, if you know Jeremy, you know that this coming out of his mouth, is nothing short of hilarious. And hilarious it was. In the end, we made it through one round of the dance not in hysteric laughter, and we then called it a day. Greasy wished us well, told us to come back for salsa class, we ran for the door like we were being chased by wild dogs. Unfortunately I don't think we'll be making it back for salsa. Unless its the type made out of tomatoes and is delicious with chips. If he wants us to come for that, we may consider. That is much more our speed.

Did I mention we are getting married tomorrow? Its the big day. I must check in for bed. Love you all. If I don't see you tomorrow - remember the rule, drink in the first hour.

Much love!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

It is blizzarding outside

and I'm just going to roll with it. This is precisely why Minnesota rabbi's will not do outside weddings. Who knows when it will start to blizzard the first day of April.
I will instead recount the positive aspects of the impending weather forecast...

1. if it hails, and your cars all get damaged, you will get new ones - which isn't half bad. Maybe we should leave Jeremy's car outside this weekend and hope for hail!

2. If it sleets, then we're lucky because it's not raining and its not snowing.

3. Sleet means it is not -20. Which is a good thing all around.

4. Decreases the chance for a forest fire. I am a friend to Smokey the Bear.

5. Pictures in the rain could be kind of cool. Lindsay and I did an amazing dance to singin' in the rain when we were young. She has it on tape. We could reenact it.

6. My hair doesn't do what I want to ever, rain or not.

7. Jeremy loves storms.

8. They say rain on your wedding day is good luck.

9. My shoes are closed toe for just such a possibility.

AND NUMBER 10 REASON WHY I DON'T CARE IF IT BLIZZARDS/SLEETS/RAINS ON MY WEDDING DAY. It will just put us in the mood for DQ Blizzards!!!!!

In other important news, I found a travel outfit. I know you were all just on the edge of your seats nervous.

I got a call from the band director yesterday and it went something like this:
Band Director (BD): Hello Kara, don't worry about a thing, we play at the Marriott Southwest all the time, we've got it down.

Kara: Good for you, but I don't really give a c**** about the Marriott Southwest. Uh, I mean, that was rude, what the f*** are you talking about?

BD: ...For your reception, starting at 7pm, we are playing outside weather permitting....

Kara: Uh buddy, if you are at my wedding, at the Marriott southwest playing outside (weather permitting) at 7:00pm on Saturday, you know what is going to hit the fan. But if you want - go ahead and play outside, it will make it easier to run away from me when I come a callin'

BD: Kara? Kara Jordani?

Kara: No sir, this is Kara Weinblatt. Kara Jordani happens to be my next door neighbor, but this is Kara Weinblatt's wedding. THIS WEEKEND. INSIDE. AT THE WESTIN EDINA GALLERIA.

BD: Oh, I had you mixed up with another wedding. The Westin, right, the Westin.

Kara (thought bubble): If this yahoo can get his head on straight, we will have music. If not, Jeremy and I will be singing. That should be some significant warning for the Westin to get them there because let me tell you, if possible, our singing is worse than our dancing. And you know how well the dancing is turning out!

T-3 days!