Wednesday, February 2, 2011

So we went to Aruba

Why? Because this weather in Minnesota stinks.

Weather.com says that today the temperature is, "0 degrees, feels like -15"

And that is why we went to Aruba.

No, I am not going to tell you all the stories of the days laying at the beach reading books, or the afternoon sail and snorkel cruise, or the wonderful dinners we had. Nope, because you would likely want to punch me in the face while you sit in the cold weather in (Chicago, New York, Minnesota,) or wherever you might be.

However, I must share one little story.

We went to Aruba with some of our closest friends, Sam and Rachel. We rented a palapa for the week, which is little shaded palm umbrella thingey. It allowed us to have our own little space, with 4 chairs, reserved for us every day, with our name on a little placard. (Though they got my name a bit confused and for a week was called, "Frank Kara".)  It also meant that most of the people around us at our palapa, had rented theirs for the week as well. So we got to know our neighbors.

Not the get to know you in the traditional sense of the phrase. Not the handshake, exchange names and pleasantries sort of way.

Rather, we go to know them in the voyeuristic, listen and watch kind of way.

For example, the gentleman in the palapa in front of us, whose placard said "Renato" was an older man. An older man who spoke Spanish. An older man, who spoke Spanish and wore a yellow Speedo. Everyday. He would arrive in his full khaki outfit, khaki shorts, shirt, and khaki loafers. Greet the wait staff, and disrobe from his Khaki, expose his yellow Speedo, and sit in his chair. For hours. No book. No music. Just sit.

He was clearly well known on the Island, or the owner of the hotel, or something like that because they treated Renato like a king. Literally. 5 men would arrive to help him situate his chair and make sure his towels were just right. Nobody fluffed my towel. WTF. So that was palapa neighbor #1.

Palapa neighbors #2 were a group of older people (in their 70's) who were from the East Cost. New Jersey I predict. They were loud and opinionated. If they wanted a towel, it was "GET ME A TOWEL". If they were deciding if they should eat, it was, "LUNCH...IS IT LUNCHTIME? I'M HUNGRY. DO YOU THINK THEY HAVE GRAPEFRUIT? I WANT A GRAPEFRUIT." The entire beach was aware of their lunch plans.

And on the first day, they visited happy hour. Well, the husbands visited happy hour, delivering drinks to their wives, who sat on their behinds and gave orders. And while I am peacefully laying on my chair, under our Palapa, reading my book, zoned out to the world, I hear, as though we are in a rock concert, and so one must speak in the loudest voice possible to be heard...

"I'LL TAKE THE VIRGIN"

Stunned, I whip my head over to our neighbors, fall out of my chair, and  and begin to laugh hysterically. Rachel, Sam and Jeremy begin to laugh, as they too heard the woman, but each chose a much more appropriate reaction as compared to my head whipping and chair falling.

Yes, she was referring to how she wanted her drink prepared. No, that was not what I thought when I fell out of my chair.

We also visited a donkey preserve. I have a video of that. I'll post it soon. Pretty hilarious. But seriously, there is a pamphlet for a place called, "Donkey Preserve" - you know you have to go.

2 comments:

Heather said...

You are too funny! Love reading about your life experiences!

Rachel Rosen said...

Oh palapa 4....I miss you so...