Thursday, August 30, 2012

Belly Love continues

Today is my birthday, which means I get to blog about something that is probably only wonderful to me. But I can do that, because it's my birthday.

So I choose to blog about my dogs, and their continued obsession over my growing belly.

Punky doesn't seem to understand the belly, she just seems to think she needs to protect it. And sit on it, or beside it, and stand guard. At all times.

You're gonna think I'm crazy, but I really think Stanley can hear the baby's heartbeat. He sits, with his ear pressed up to my belly, whenever possible. He stares at it, and then presses his ear and cheek up to the belly.
Yes, I realize that you all probably think I'm a dog nut (or just a nut in general). However, I that was probably the case long before the baby.

I'm a proud mama already. A proud dog mama.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012


Today is August 28th.

The Franklet is due October 28th.

This means the Franklet is due TWO MONTHS FROM TODAY.

I am extatic.

I am anxious.

I am nervous.

I am ready to hold my little girl.

I am sick of being pregnant. (I have been pregnant since it was very, very cold outside, summer is almost over, and it is almost time to be very, very cold again. Thus, I have been pregnant for a very, very long time.)

I am ready to stop looking at the scale and watching the numbers go up, and up and up.

I am ready for people to stop saying super inappropriate things like...
"You are HUGE!"
"You look like you're about ready to give birth any day"
"You are tiny, there's no way the baby will be born in October"
And my personal favorite....
"I hope motherhood is all it's cracked up to be. But I'm guessing it's not."

If you're looking for comments to make to pregnant people, here are some good ones that they will appreciate...
"You look really nice today"
"That's such a great shirt, it really looks nice on you"
"You have looked really fashionable and nice throughout your pregnancy"
"You really look healthy and happy"
"You're going to be a wonderful Mom"

Two months from today. I cannot wait. 

Thought I would leave you with a picture of me and two of the pregnant girlfriends. We took this last night after an early Birthday celebration for me. An early Birthday celebration where the topic du jour was bodily functions during labor. Oh how times have changed.

Monday, August 27, 2012


I am not the least bit ashamed to say that I am a coupon clipper. I was a coupon clipper way before it was cool to be a coupon clipper. I'm not one of those extreme coupon-ers, but I do keep a little expandable file organized with coupons, but ONLY for items I would buy anyways.

But, I'm cheap. And I love saving money. And I work pretty darn hard, and I'd like to keep my moolah to myself. So I clip coupons.

And sometimes, they are a source of laugher. Often, there are coupons for these crazy looking elastic waisted pants, or odd little sculptures, very weird things.

And then I saw this one in the Sunday Paper yesterday.

This takes the cake.

Save $1.00 on any 1 preparation H product when you buy any 2 packs of ChapStick.

Jeremy's theory was that if you are chapped in one place, you're probably chapped in the other too.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Interview time

The Franklet arrives in just over 8 weeks...and that means...time to pick a pediatrician! I LOVED my pediatrician growing up. I went to him until I turned 18. Right before my 18th birthday, I called his office to make an appointment for a checkup. They asked how old my child was. I told them that I was the patient. The receptionist laughed. It was in that moment I realized it was time to find a new doc, and now, 10+ years later, I still have not found one I liked as much as that pediatrician.

So, we see this as a big decision! We want to find someone that the Franklet loves as much as we loved our pediatricians growing up.

And the Franklet's Dad is a bit protective. And wants the best for his baby. And wants to make sure he can call the doctor at 2:00am to discuss the rash on her butt.

So last night, we went to 'prospective parents night' at our first choice pediatrician's office. The office is lovely, they answered all of our questions, the doctor was fantastic, everything met our needs.

And then it was Q&A time. Now, I had questions, but Jeremy didn't think they were appropriate to ask. However, I think they are pivotal questions that make any child's pediatric medicine experience.

1. Do the kids get a sucker out of a Pinocchio jar after vaccinations? (I always got a sucker out of a Pinocchio jar. I would settle if the Franklet got a sucker out of a different jar, but she needs candy after shots. That's a requirement.)

2. How hard is it to cheat on the eye test in this office (because I cheated it every year, and made it 5 extra years before I had to get glasses)

3. Do you have a subscription to Highlights for kids magazine?

4. Please review the toys available in your lobby.

5. How do you react when a kid kicks and screams when you are trying to do a throat culture/give them a vaccine? (Because I was that kid, and I anticipate my daughter will be the same)

These all seemed like very important questions to me. The other parents were asking about the urgent care hours, and the vaccine schedule.

I wanted to know about suckers and toys.

What does that say about me as a parent?!

Tuesday, August 21, 2012


Lately, I have found that I get way too much email.

Somehow, along the way, I managed to get on every email list known to man including: Martha Stewart, Oprah, Vegetarian Times (no, I'm not a vegetarian), Dog Fancy, Yahoo groups for neighborhoods I don't live in, every sale and discount site on the web (Groupon, Living Social etc..), every Flash Sale site on the web (Joss&Main, Gilt Groupe, HauteLook etc...), every wedding, home design and now maternity store imaginable, and finally, every kids clothing site represented on the World Wide Web.

And I'm sick of it.


Some people say you should have all of that stuff sent to another email account, or to a special folder, but that would just stress me out. Because I would want to look at it and clean it out. I hate to have unread emails. It's a neurosis of mine.

So, I am unsubscribing. From everything. Or nearly everything.

In this new-found pursuit, I found a pretty cool website that I thought I'd share.

Appropriately, it is called

Basically, you tell it what your interests are, and it condenses all of the discount sites into one email, and you can select the frequency. So, instead of getting 3 emails per day from each company, (Groupon, Living Social etc...), I get one email, once per week, summarizing everything available that week.


It's life changing.

Friday, August 17, 2012

Light Fixtures

I found these awesome light fixtures at Crate and Barrel yesterday. Problem is, I don't need any light fixtures. I seriously have a light fixturing problem. I love them. So many different options. They completely change the look of a room. Yes, I have an obsession with light fixtures.

But these ones are really cool. And they're an AMAZING deal. And I have nowhere to put them. So you should go buy them.
If you live in Minnesota, they have them on display at the Galleria store.
Go buy them.
Then invite me over so I can look at them in your house.
They're cooler than they look in photos...

I think you should get one of each shape. And put them over your kitchen table, or island.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

She's a Butternut Squash

Franklet update....
  Size of the baby?  
About 17 inches long, 3.1 pounds
About the size of a butternut squash...
She looks just like us...doesn't she!?
Maternity Clothes?  
Uh yes. And sadly, I am starting to grow out of my first round of maternity clothes. Here are my two tips for maternity clothes...
1. If it seems too big when you first try it on, early in your pregnancy, it's probably perfect. Do NOT buy things that fit at that time. It should fit in the shoulders, that's about it.
2. When you first go shopping for maternity clothes, remember, if you think you will want something at some point in your pregnancy, buy it now. You will have 6 months tops to wear these clothes, get as much wear out of them as possible. Buy everything you think you will want early, and wear it a lot.

Jeremy has been leaving for work early I took my own pic this time.
Stretch marks?  
Nope, thankfully, still no stretch marks. Thanks for the good genes, Mom! (they say it has nothing to do with lotion's all genetics)

Best Moments?  
The other day I was sitting at my desk, resting my hand on my belly, when all of a sudden, my hand was propelled off of my belly. I put it back on there, and again, boom, pushed off my belly. Turns out our little girl already has opinions about what she wants, and how she wants it. And apparently she doesn't want her mom resting her arm on her!

Oh yes, our little one continues to be VERY active. I really don't think she sleeps. She just squirms and kicks all day long. Like her mom.
Food Cravings?   
Not really. I'm back to being pretty uninterested in a lot of foods. I tried Salmon for the first time in a long time last night. That was a bad idea. I tried chicken last week, also a terrible idea.

Anything making you queasy or sick? 
Chicken, Salmon and Broccoli. Three foods I used to like a lot. Fortunately, ice cream is still quite enjoyable!

What I'm looking forward to?  
Normal workouts. I found out at the doctor this week that my regular workout routine is causing me to have slight contractions. Not Braxton Hicks, but real contractions. So, he told me to 'take it easy'. I don't 'take it easy'. It's really not in my nature. I'm really struggling with this news. I know most people would delight in the news that they should back off of the workouts, but I am not delighting in this news. Instead, I'm panicking.

Contractions from workouts. And strange emotional bouts. And, this is going to sound strange, but my What to Expect when You're Expecting book says it's perfectly normal....boredom with pregnancy. Please don't judge me, but this blog is about honesty, and I'm really getting bored with it. 10 more weeks to go and I'm sick of waiting. I'm not a patient person.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Little Soldiers

We recently took a class with our other pregnant friends called, "Dogs and Storks". It covers issues that people have when they bring babies into homes with dogs. All of our preggo friends have dogs. They are our children. I know that will change, but I really, really love my dogs, and I want to be prepared for the enormous change that is about to happen to them.

After this class I was panicked. Our dogs are great, but they have some issues.

Stanley barks when he is not with humans. He hates to be away from people.

Punky tries to run out the door when people come over.

Generally, our dogs run our house. We cater to their every need. They are our children. It is 100% our fault. But they're so stinkin' cute.

Towards the end of this class, the trainer emphasized that we all still had time left before the babies arrived, and we should really spend it working with them on their specific issues. She mentioned that there are day trainers who can come in if you are really 'Lazy' and train your dogs for you.

We are not lazy. We are busy. We both have professional jobs that require 40+ hours per week. We don't have hours and hours at home to work on barking. That doesn't make us lazy, it makes us, busy. Or lazy. Whatever.

As the trainer was leaving, Jeremy nearly chased her down, asking quietly if he could have the name of that "Lazy person's trainer". He said, "Ya know, in case we know someone who might need them".


So we hired the Lazy person's trainer.

And requested that she turn our dogs into little soldiers.

We gave her a list of things we wanted them to do.
1. No barking for attention
2. Stay out the nursery
3. It would be nice if Stanley would go in his kennel. But he refuses.
4. Wait at the door
5. Drop it/Leave it
6. Don't pee in the house
7. Don't lick everyone

Little soldiers, I requested.

The trainer spent the past 3 weeks working with our dogs and came last night to 'present what they had learned'. I fully expected her to show up with our check in her hands, returning it because they couldn't be trained.

She didn't return our check, but she did start with, "Well, I didn't make as much progress as I would have liked." 

Little soldiers they are not.

But they're on the right track. I guess. And now we have to work with them ourselves. But I suppose she started them on the right track.

And so begins....Little Soldiers boot camp at the Frank family home.

I have created the following calendar to track our daily training sessions.

Boot Camp begins tonight.

We have 10 weeks to get these dogs in shape.

Monday, August 13, 2012


I just returned from a trip to one of my favorite stores, a dorky obsession of mine, Home Goods.

I walked in the door.

Looked in front of me, and saw it.

The first three aisles and the entire main entryway were decorated with...Halloween decor.
Halloween decor means a couple of things.

First, it means the store is jumping the gun a bit here, as Halloween is still 10 weeks away.

It means that school will be starting soon, the weather will soon change, and ....

The FRANKLET will be making her debut around Halloween.

Well, hopefully before Halloween.

WOW. OMG. Halloween Decor = Franklet.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Did you know?

Every car is different. And, on every car, the gas tank is on a different side. This is one of the annoying things about getting used to a new car. 

You pull in to get gas, and cannot remember which side the gas tank is on. Then you pull up to the side you think it is on, and inevitably, it is on the other side. And then you look like an idiot as you pull your car around to the other side, looking around to make sure nobody saw you looking like a dork on the wrong side.

I have solved all of your problems. Well really, my friend Rachel has solved all of your problems.

Perhaps everyone in the world knows about this except me, but I will share in case you do not.

Did you know, that when you look at the gas gauge on your car, there is a little arrow?
Look at the little graphic of the gas pump...and the arrow pointing to the right
Yes, that means that the gas tank is located on the right side of the car.

Mind blown.

Did not know this.

Please tell me I am not the only one who did not know this.


Monday, August 6, 2012

Stan and The Belly

While I may find my ever-growing belly to be a bit of a nuisance, there is someone in our household who loves it.

Granted, he is not the one who is unable to bend down to pick things up, nor the one who lays in bed for 10 minutes trying to decide if I just "have to pee" or if I am going to "burst if I wait 1 more second to pee" because it's so much work to stand up...

Stanley Benjamin Frank.

Since the beginning, my youngest child has loved the belly. And his affection continues to grow as my belly grows.

I don't know if he can hear her moving around, but he certainly can feel her as the little Franklet is quite the active baby.

I think Mr. Stanley Frank has already selected his new BFF. Something tells me the Franklet and Stanley will be inseparable.

Friday, August 3, 2012


There's something you should know about me.

Deep down, I'm really still basically a 10 year old. You know how most people get older, and stop giggling at ridiculous things? And when something is slightly funny or embarrassing, they are able to control their emotions and laughter? Well, I cannot. Particularly the giggling.

When I was in elementary school, my mom was once called by my music teacher to discuss my behavior in school. He was upset because I was giggling in class. This teacher wore the world's tightest pants and was beyond strange. Of course I was giggling in class. And what did my mom do when the teacher called? She giggled. And then told him that she was glad I was happy, and she was unconcerned about giggling. And so I have continued to live my life, laughing uncontrollably at hilarious things.

Case in point:
Last night, I went to a prenatal yoga class with one of my aforementioned pregnant friends, Debra. Now, prenatal yoga class in itself is pretty hilarious. There are sculptures of pregnant people all around. There is a room full of pregnant people, very pregnant people, which for some reason, always makes me laugh. The instructors are constantly talking about the beauty of the birthing process. All of these things typically cause me to laugh.

Last night, at the beginning of prenatal yoga class, we were asked to draw a card from the deck of "Goddess Cards", and leave it face down on our mat. We were then all instructed to turn over our cards and read them to ourselves and envision why that card was so meaningful in our lives right now.

This whole scene already sparked my giggling.

And then we turn the cards over.

I read my card to myself...
Okay, so that's not so hilarious, it's kind of sweet. I can get on board with this one. I would even agree that the universe has been pouring its abundance out to me. Lovely.

Then Debra turns over her card.
Bodies of water. Basically, her card tells her to find the nearest pool. Or in her case, as she has been struggling with terrible morning sickness, my interpretation was...the nearest toilet.

And this causes me to laugh uncontrollably. Like literally uncontrollably.

We are then asked to go around the room and say our name, "guess date", where we are birthing (we are the only two that have selected certified doctors, birthing in a hospital, with an epidural, and not in water), and then finally we have to read our Goddess cards.

I read my card in my head over and over, sure I would start giggling while reading. I managed to get through, and then it was Debra's turn to read. While everyone else reads their motivational card, I just stare at her, about to read...bodies of water, go find a pool. At this point, I am literally unable to breathe.

And it's Debra's turn...

"Uh, yea, I'm Debra, and I'm birthing at Fairview, and...and...and...I have bodies of water, uh, I mean Sulis, yea."  And then she looks pathetically at the next person, hoping that she will go and relieve her of any further discussion of bodies of water.

And my laughter continues.

I always thought that becoming a mother would relieve me of some of my girlish giggles. I think I was wrong. I might be the first 80 year old that still giggles at something hilarious in the nursing home.

Perhaps there are some things you just never grow out of.