Friday, January 3, 2014

Edward and Rhonda

I am now 1 year, 2 months and 5 days into motherhood.

And I still don't feel like a 'parent'.

Most days.

Now there are some days when I'm covered in baby yogurt, find a Cheerio in my hair, and then discover a mum mum attached to my sweater 2 hours after I arrived at work (those stupid Mum Mums stick to everything).  And on those days, I really feel like a mom.

But generally, Jeremy and I both often feel like we are just playing house.
And babysitting this awesome kid.
And sometimes, babysitting a kid who is being less awesome.
And on those days.
On those rare days.
We ask for her parents to come home.

We named her 'parents' Edward (Ed) and Rhonda.  Ed and Rhonda just dropped off this kid who looks a lot like Jeremy and acts a lot like me and they've left her here for a 1 year, 2 months and 5 day babysitting gig.

And on those rare days (i.e. YESTERDAY), when she's acting like a crazy person, throwing yogurt in my face, rubbing salmon in Jeremy's hair, screaming uncontrollably until we give her cheese and nothing else, and insisting on sitting in my lap while holding a book and sucking on a pacifier and drinking milk from her sippy cup (yes, trying to drink milk while keeping a pacifier in her mouth.  No, that does not work very well. Yes, it does result in milk all over the place)....

We ask for Ed and Rhonda to return.  We sometimes scream for Ed and Rhonda.

Last night Jeremy gave her a bath last night to cleanse the salmon, cheese, quinoa, yogurt and milk out of her hair/ears/face. I walked downstairs to scrub the yogurt, cheese, quinoa and salmon off the floor/walls/highchair/dogs and found that one of my dogs had peed on the kitchen floor....

And I screamed for Ed and Rhonda to return.

Don't we all have those days?

Most of the time it's a pretty awesome babysitting gig, but every once in a while it would be nice if her 'parents' showed up.